Saturday, February 2, 2008

Preping for Sofia's IEP meeting

I got home from picking up the boys yesterday afternoon, and there was a message on the machine saying I could pick up Sofia's reports from her evaluations until 4pm. So packed them all back in the car (Sam was having a tantrum, but pretzels helped) and got it.

I am always pleased to read about how wonderful my children are, but a tiny part of me is always taken aback when the quantified numbers are in my face. At 35 months of age, Sofia got the following ratings:
- Perceptual/Fine Motor (27 months, with splinter skills through 32 months)
- Cognition: 27 months (with splinter 28-31 months)
- Communication: Skills and reports scattered from 20-23 months
- Gross Motor: 23 months
- Self-Care: 30-34 months
- Social/Emotional Interaction: 35 months

Now, that does indicate progress since her last eval at 32 months; the list in the same above order was 26, 27, 18 [16verbal/24 sign], 22, 29, and 30. But it also tells me that my daughter, who is about to turn 3, and whom everyone always says is "doing so well" and "is really smart", is really more like someone who just turned 2.

Which is fine. There's that part of me who loves the "extended babyhood" of my third-and-last child. We had lunch the other day with two friends and their daughters, who are all about the same age as Sofia, and while she got along well with them, it is obvious that they have far more skill at things like communication, motor, self-car (in this case feeding and toileting) and cognition.

Which is fine. But I usually forget about the numbers. Seeing them on paper is just that 6-month reminder that, yes, my daughter is indeed Retarded, in her growth, in her cognition, in her skills.

Retarded isn't bad. It just means she goes at a slower rate than typical. I know. I know. It's ok.

And I am so very proud of her for all she can do. We were in the craft store the other day, and one of the women who works there has a 21 year old brother with DS. She is always so impressed with Sofia. So I guess we are bordering both worlds: she's slow for typical, fast for DS.

But what does that mean for her future? Where will she fit? Will she be able to keep up with typical, or will she be happy enough with slow? I think that's really my biggest worry for her.


Mommy to those Special Ks said...

Kennedy's in that same group... and I hate IFSPs. I hate numbers. I try HARD not to look at them, because like Sofia, Kennedy IS doing SO well. But those darn numbers. Let's just throw them all out the window ok?! :) She's doing great mama!

amy flege said...

YUP,do what renee said and just throw those numbers out the window! Sofia is doing wonderful!! I enjoy the longer baby stage as well....hugs!

Sustenance Scout said...

So glad I found your site via Rhett's Journey. Your family is beautiful! I'm trying to spread the word about Pam at Rhett's Journey and the difficulties her family is facing. Feel free to check out my current post at or check out Pam's updates on her blog. Thanks so much and best wishes always! Karen in Denver

Dori (Aviva's mommy) said...

Sounds like Sofia is doing great...and she is going at her pace.

Give her a big hug from us!